The
Reluctant Gift: Putting Our Time on the Altar
by
H. Wallace Goddard
It
was a demanding day. Many projects. With some luck I might complete
the essential tasks by the end of the day. I put my fingers to
the keyboard just as a colleague stuck his head in my doorway.
“Do you have a minute?”
My
mind raced. How much time could I sacrifice and still meet the
deadline? Should I suggest a time tomorrow?
“Sure!
Come in.” We swapped pleasantries. Then halting words hinted at
difficult issues. The natural man in me squirmed: “I don’t have
time for this.” I turned to the angels of my better nature for
counsel: “When God sends an opportunity to serve, welcome it with
a warm embrace. Be sure to thank Heaven for the opportunity.”
After
most of the morning was invested in offering an ear and a word
of encouragement, I should have felt panicked about pressing projects
delayed. Instead I felt serene. “Thank you, Father, for the opportunity
to deliver a heavenly message of hope.” In spite of less time
and less energy, somehow the project was completed on schedule.
Turning
Ourselves Over to Him
I
have always been amazed how much gets done when I do things the
Lord’s way. I am surprised that, when I release my stranglehold
on my life and turn my time and energy over to Him, my life is
not only richer but also more productive.
I
love a story from pioneer Joseph Millett’s journal. “One of my
children came in, said that Brother Newton Hall's folks were out
of bread. Had none that day. I put . . . our flour in sack to
send up to Brother Hall's. Just then Brother Hall came in. Says
I, ‘Brother Hall, how are you out for flour?’ ‘Brother Millett,
we have none.’ ‘Well, Brother Hall, there is some in that sack.
I have divided it and was going to send it to you. Your children
told mine that you were out.’ Brother Hall began to cry. Said
he had tried others. Could not get any. Went to the cedars and
prayed to the Lord and the Lord told him to go to Joseph Millett.
‘Well, Brother Hall, you needn't bring this back if the Lord sent
you for it. You don't owe me for it.’ You can't tell how good
it made me feel to know that the Lord knew that there was such
a person as Joseph Millett” (See Eugene England; BYU Studies.
Vol. 2, p.148).
When
God sends opportunity to us, what is our attitude? Do we demand
proof that it is from God? Do we give grudgingly, reluctantly,
sparingly? Or do we, as Joseph Millett, thank Heaven for the opportunity
to be useful to divine purposes?
“For
although a man may have many revelations, and have power to do
many mighty works, yet if he boasts in his own strength, and sets
at naught the counsels of God, and follows after the dictates
of his own will and carnal desires, he must fall and incur
the vengeance of a just God upon him” (D&C 3:4).
He
Will Magnify Us
I
remember when I started my first job as a university faculty member,
a colleague was assigned to show me around. As he described the
expectations for success in my new job, I felt increasingly overwhelmed.
I felt very sure that I could not do all that was expected. I
wondered how many months I could work there before I was found
to be inadequate and was unceremoniously fired. The gloom grew.
After a few weeks I felt fully depressed.
But
desperation can be very useful for God’s purposes. I finally concluded
that I probably could not meet the expectations but I would use
whatever time I had to do some good. I accepted opportunities
to teach, to write, to collaborate. I limped along doing what
I could to be useful. Yet I was often amazed at the ways God found
to use me. After five years on the job, I submitted my vita for
promotion and tenure. My department head, already familiar with
my work, studied the document. She came to my office one day shaking
her head, “How do you accomplish so much?”
My
soul knew the answer. Early on, when I despaired of my ability,
I had stopped trying to do Wally’s bidding and started trying
to do God’s bidding. I had decided that I would try to do a little
good if I could while not worrying about the glory.
Getting
Out of His Way
For
mortals, the accomplishment of great things is often blocked by
vain ambition. Those who carefully build an empire, build in vain.
Those of us who jealousy guard our time, misunderstand who owns
our time.
The
opposite danger is that we will abdicate our responsibility to
do what we can. At the beginning of each day we can put our time
and talents on the altar. We should not turn our lives over to
God and sit on a rock waiting for instructions.
Following
the example of the Brother of Jared (Ether 3), I say to Him every
day, “I am encompassed about by a flood of demands from inside
me and around me. Do not be angry because of my weakness. I am
unworthy and I know it. As a traveler in this fallen world, my
nature has become evil continually. Please look upon me in pity.
Turn away thine anger. Thou art holy and dwellest in the heavens.
Thou are merciful. Thou hast all power and can do whatever Thou
wilt. Thou hast commanded that we call upon Thee. So I come. I
ask that Thou take my weak will, my imperfect plans, my faltering
capacity and fill them with Thy Perfect Purposes.”
We
begin each day with some ideas of what may be expected. We make
sensible plans. But we do not claim ownership of our day. We ask
for His inspiration to do those things we feel we should do. If
He has plans for us other than those we have made, we follow gladly.
Mere
Shepherds
In
our lives, we are as shepherds. It is not we but He who owns the
sheep. Yet we are responsible to care for and protect those sheep.
We shepherd those minutes and opportunities for the growth of
His flock.
“Behold,
I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore
wise as serpents, and harmless as doves” (Matthew 10:16). Our
hours, our resources, even our thoughts and feelings are to be
put in His service.
As
a young missionary I learned a verse that still blesses me today.
“Father,
where shall I serve today?”
And
my love flowed warm and free
And
He pointed me out a tiny spot
And
said, “Tend that for me.”
I
answered quickly,
“Oh,
no! Not that!
Why
no one will ever see.
No
matter how well my work was done,
Not
that little place for me.”
The
word he spoke,
It
was not stern.
And
He answered me tenderly,
“Ah,
little one, search that heart of thine.
Art
thou working for thee or me?”
Nazareth
was a little place.
And
so was Galilee.
When
we are tempted to impose our preferences and preconceptions---even
seemingly righteous ones---on God’s plan, we can say with Alma:
“But behold, I am a man, and do sin in my wish; for I ought to
be content with the things which the Lord hath allotted unto me”
(Alma 29:3).
Letting
Him Govern
We
may feel that we should make lots of money in order to build the
kingdom. God may call us to build the kingdom with humble ministering
rather than cash. We may wish to have the exemplary family. God
may call us to learn patience by the things which we suffer. We
may want to make big differences through our callings or in our
communities. God may invite us to do a few good things for His
most unnoticed children.
As
President Benson reminded us, “men and women who turn their lives
over to God will discover that He can make a lot more out of their
lives than they can” ("Jesus Christ, Gifts and Expectations,"
Christmas Devotional, 7 December 1986; Teachings of Ezra Taft
Benson, p.361.)
Most
of the time God does not ask us to do some great thing---to sell
our house or to lay down our lives. He meets us in our day-to-day
decisions. He invites us to partner with Him in the Great and
Humble Work of Redemption. The great evidence of our faith is
not the one great sacrifice we make but the millions of moments
given to Him. May we trust Him with our time, our talents, and
everything we have.
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