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Meridian Moments: Personal Connections Between Readers and Writers
Edited and compiled by Kathy Green

The Cure

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The Spiritual Cancer Called Umbrage, by Paul Bishop

Written with such skill and candor, this article should be used as the basis for every High Council talk in the Church next month.

Name withheld

Brother Paul Bishop's article is, once again, insightful and valuable. However, there is one notion within this last article that I feel needed to be taken one step farther.

He wrote about the grandmother asking the boy, Will, to remove the nails previously pounded into a 4x4 board. Her lesson was that the nails left permanent damage to the board. That was a true statement. However, the analogy, wherein the nails represent insults and the removal represents apology (repentance), fails.

True repentance, in which the offender confesses the fault, apologizes, and does some sort of compensatory behavior, should lead to forgiveness from the offended AND from the Lord. It should also allow the offender to forgive him/herself. True repentance, as Michael McLean once said, is not the "law of the second chance, but the law of the first chance over." NO scar would remain, if repentance AND forgiveness were true.

I find Alma the Younger's conversion story compelling, but not just for the change that he underwent. I find it rather miraculous that the people forgave him so completely that he later became the prophet. In Will's case, his growth through these nail-pounding lessons led him to avoid giving insult and apologizing quickly when necessary. I daresay that the impact of his changed behavior and attitude upon the others was to make acceptance of his apologies much easier, and their view of him much kinder and love-filled.

Holes in boards need to be filled by a Master who can make the scars disappear. Those who have been scarred in some way by the actions of another need the Master's touch, too. The Savior's Atonement not only paid the price for sin, but was performed to heal us in all ways. As we come unto Christ, we lose our desire for sin, and we lose the pains we feel from our losses, injuries, and properly repented sins.

Grace MacDowell-Boyer, M.A.
Auburn, New York

Brother Bishop Responds:

Sister MacDowell-Boyer --

Thank you for your kind and insightful response to my article on umbrage. Your point is well take, and I believe the goal we should aim for. Unfortunately, for many, the 'holes' left by retracted and forgiven insults remain like scars after a successful surgery. While this does not approach the perfect forgiveness of the Lord, it is often the best we can accomplished with the skill we possess on this side of the veil.

Thanks again for taking the time to respond. It is interest such as yours, and the resultant exchange of ideas, that make writing for Meridian so special.

Paul Bishop

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Two Sides of the Forgiveness Coin

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What Forgiveness Is and Isn’t, by Fay A. Klinger

This is good. I think it is a very important and somewhat misunderstood topic. I don't know much about betrayal and abuse, having never experienced them to any huge degree. I will look forward to other installments.

One point I always like to make in discussing forgiveness is how often in the Doctrine and Covenants we read a passage such as "your sins are forgiven you" prior to the Lord communing with or communicating his message to the Prophet or other recipient. I have recognized in my own life that this forgiveness facilitates rapprochement and union and allows the presence of the Spirit. This phenomenon gives us a glimpse of communion with the Lord and our Heavenly Father.

Todd Lillywhite
Murray, Utah

**

I just loved your article. I'm on my second marriage and we both are LDS. I had an awful time with almost all of my stepchildren, so I talked to my bishop and he gave me a clue not to be hurt over and over again, and it is just what you said in you article. I have to learn how to handle my stepchildren more wisely, even if that means to avoid constant contact.

Later, one of them who has hurt me most had his first child born with some problems. When I knew about that I couldn't sleep at night. I have prayed and fasted for his little family because I truly felt sorry for him. Also a feeling of guilt for what had happened came to my mind and heart; therefore I prayed again explaining to the Lord that I had no revenge feelings towards this stepson and absolutely wasn't rejoicing in his pain. Then I had the prompting of the Holy Ghost assuring me that the trial he was facing was not because of me, but in fact, it was the Lord's way to bless him. This prompting really gave peace to my heart.

On your article, I also loved the explanation that our forgiveness is somehow independent from the person who has hurt us. He/she will have to repent and be accountable for his/her acts and handle the consequences of it (independently of our personal will towards him/her). Confirming that the vengeance belongs to the Lord, because only He knows the right measure to correct a child.

Name withheld by request

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Chocolate and Nut Case

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Jellybeans in the Carpet: Meridian Readers Scrape up Sticky Issues

Edited and compiled by Kathy Green

I have to agree with the comment on the choices of food being brought to our chapels to feed our little (and not so little ones). Last week while trying to set up chairs for our Relief Society meeting, not only did we have to pick up pieces of chocolate and nuts (a brownie?) from the floor, but we had to stop and clean a chair off so someone didn’t ruin a Sunday dress. Why do we need to have a discussion on what is appropriate for our meeting house? Shouldn’t it be clear, that we share the building, and it is cleaned mostly by volunteers now?

Name withheld by request

**

Roses are red,
Grass is green.
Kids should be heard,
and not obscene.

There are those who say that taking kids out of the chapel when they get fussy only teaches them that by fussing they get to go out in the lobby where things are a lot more interesting. At least they have control of the situation (by forcing Mommy to carry them out to the lobby) instead of having to learn to sit quietly

Sometimes I wonder if our Father in Heaven is nearly as offended by the way some people act as some of us are at the way others act. Or how He feels about us judging each other on their level of reverence. Obviously, some things are over the line, but I think He can forgive a little noise, or even a little gum-chewing on occasion.

When a friend said that in her former church, one could hear a pin drop, I had to think, “That's what you get for holding services in a bowling alley.”

We are a family church, which welcomes babies and toddlers in sacrament meeting instead of exiling them and some unlucky adults to the nursery during every meeting — even though babies and toddlers will cry, giggle and/or talk at "inappropriate" times such as during the sacrament prayer. Those about two years old or above who have learned to walk will, at some time or other, inevitably break loose from the brood Mommy is trying to ride herd on alone and go running up to the stand.

My first ward, the Ogden 10th Ward was not silent. The people, many of them in their 60s, 70s, and beyond, were enthusiastic and friendly. There were very few babies, but I don’t think I ever heard a pin drop.

Ronn, no last name, please

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Written Notice

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Mormon Suffragist Emmeline B. Wells Gets Book Treatment

Thanks for the notice of this important new biography.

Just last year I visited the National Women's Hall of Fame, home of the women's suffrage movement, which began in 1848 in Seneca Falls, NY — not far from the Peter Whitmer farm. Well aware of the active participation of Mormon women with the leading Suffragettes, I was appalled to see the stamp of modern prejudice throughout this museum. Every conceivable ethnic, minority, and union group is represented — but there is not a single word about the contribution of Mormon women, whose ability to vote preceded the rest of America! We left the modern women's movement over abortion rights, and they have not forgiven us for it. We have been written out of the history.

Congratulations to the author of this much-needed book!

Susan Zmolek,
Parker, Colorado

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Shared Tears

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Missionary Killed by Drunk Driver

I am always saddened to tears when a missionary dies by any means. I think of the family who has had such blessings from sending a son or daughter on a mission. I think of the challenge they now face. I pray the Lord will comfort them. I know of the feeling of loss when a child is taken from my home, yet I know they are in the best home. How can we deny the Lord knows more than we, that these souls are truly needed there. I know they have the opportunity to bless and help us who are left behind for a season. I cannot deny the Lord knows more than me. Elder Turley has been given much preparation for his next mission, one more the Lord has for him.

Susan Chidester
Glenwood, Missouri

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Visions of Eternity: Heavenly Gates

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The Trailblazer for Today's Mormon Media Composers: Crawford Gates Celebrates his 80th with Music, by Ron Simpson, Utah Songwriter Advocate and General Manager, Tantara Records

I’m searching for how to contact Crawford Gates, to thank him for "Visions of Eternity." Because of the powerful impact it has had and continues to have on my testimony, I found this lovely tribute article.

I was able to be at one of the debut performances at my alma mater, Ricks College, (now BYU-Idaho), with one of our student children. Even though our seats were not in the best place, it was a miracle to me to be there. The power of the spirit in the early passages clearly describes Heavenly Father himself to me.

Later, in the passages, "He lives, he lives, our Savior lives" Joseph and Oliver's testimony embraces me each time. I listen to the music in my car, so I can absorb the sounds, and concentrate. I could go on and on. Brother Gates has given me an anchor, which I turn to in great periods of need. Recently has been such a need, so this morning my first thoughts were to write to thank him.

Myrna Bingham Liddell
Langley, Washington

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Smooth Moves

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BYU Vocal Group Wins World Championship

Having a son in law in the singing group gives me more than a passing interest in this article and is probably the main reason for my response.

First of all, I am very impressed that the article with photo is already on your website!

I was in attendance at the performance and spoke with a number of Vocal Point members. The details of your story seem to be very accurate and I appreciate the time the writer took to get the quotes, etc.

I would add only that the crowd’s reaction to BYU's pick as top choice was overwhelmingly positive; and that Vocal Point also won the award for “Best Choreography.”

Robert Leinbach
Las Vegas, Nevada

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Beauty and the Boost

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Joseph Brickey: Art that Connects the Senses and the Spirit, by Jen Swindle

Thank you for featuring Brother Brickey and his beautiful sensitive art renderings. Without first finding out he was "Brickey," I liked his art. I saw one at the Salt Lake Temple foyer of the resurrected Christ and Mary Magdelene at the tomb. It is powerful. A temple worker shared that it was painted by Joseph Brickey and that a series appears in the Family Visitor's Center there on Temple Square. We visited it and were very moved. One or two images from that piece were part of an Ensign magazine spread a few years back. Since then we have a few of his works in our home. His father was, as he said, an Institute teacher [San Diego State University] and my husband and I knew him and their family's best friends the late John and Donna Young.

Thank you for such an in-depth article of how he is still learning and developing his talent by "attacking your weaknesses." This is so inspiring. Seeing what is and then having to truly develop imagination to paint that which one has never witnessed save through the spirit. How blessed are the millions throughout the world to be able to enjoy through Ensign, on-line through Meridian Magazine, and at Temple Square. It really can't get any better than that for him or for us in "gladening the heart and enlivening the soul."

Sister Sharreen Touchet

Beautiful pictures and exceptional philosophy of life from an artist. I have enjoyed his pictures in various periodicals. Now I enjoy them more knowing of the depth and history of the artist. Thanks Meridian for the pictures along with the text.

Duane Laws
Ypsilanti, Michigan

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Change the Channels

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Becoming the Vision the Prophet Saw
by Kieth Merrill

Is there a "safe" viewing network in America?

Perhaps a network that shows the movies like "Napoleon Dynamite", but not on a pay-per-view basis. What about a comedy that my 6- and 7-year-old grandsons could watch with me that would not make me turn the channel quickly because of the bad language or sexual content? They're not much into "Leave It to Beaver."

I'd also like to have national news on that "safe" channel. I enjoy BYU-TV but I truly want more programming. PBS is fine, but again, needs more programming. Am I just asking too much?

Laurel Moser
Wellington Kansas

 


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© 2006 Meridian Magazine.  All Rights Reserved.

 
About the Editor:

Kathy Green teaches writing and editing classes for the North Idaho College workforce training center, and "The Lives of the Prophets" to her twelve-year-olds in Sunday school. She has six kids, all keepers, and is currently knitting a blanket for her 11th grandchild, who is due in August. Like most of the Meridian staff, she is a published author; but she is struggling to put together her journal and family history, and stands in awe of those of our readers who are way ahead of her there.

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