My series about life lessons learned from the game of Scrabble would not be complete without a section on how to recognize the tactics of the adversary. Previously I have referenced my battles against the artificial intelligence of my computer opponent, but it takes the devious mind of a live opponent to successfully model certain behaviors common to a certain someone who inhabits the nether world. I refer to my husband Thom as said opponent.

No one I have ever met can inflict self-doubt and confusion as well as he can. He is a master of lies, deception and trickery second only to that original snake in the grass. You need only play a game or two of Scrabble with my husband to become familiar with all the wiles of the devil.

Although spelling is my strong suit, and I spell much better than Thom, when I challenge one of his words and tell him it is not spelled right, he will smile and ask me, “Are you sure there isn't an alternate spelling for that word?” There have been times, of course, that I have had the courage of my convictions and found that although my version was the preferred spelling, there was more than one accepted spelling. Knowing that this has been the case in the past, he will seize on that possibility and often talk me out of challenging a word I knew I should have challenged. I am learning to listen to my first instinct and not let him erode my confidence in my gut decisions, because although I am not always right, I am right more often than I am wrong.

Another thing he will do is play words that are not real words, with a definition at the ready. “And what does that mean?” I will ask. Because he is a college professor and has access to vocabulary words I have never heard of, I have fallen for this many times, especially if his made-up definition sounds plausible, and they always do. He says the rules don't state that you can't play fake words. “It doesn't have to be a real word. I just have to be able to make you believe it is a real word.” He is way too good at this.

More annoying, however, than finding that he has successfully bluffed by playing a word that isn't a word and has convinced me that it is, is when he has played a word that he didn't know was a word, made up a definition, I decided not to fall for his definition, challenged him, and then found that word in the dictionary with a completely different definition. I now know that “gox” is gaseous oxygen.

He always says the same thing at those times: “I love to see that look on your face.”

Sometimes he lies to me by telling the truth. “I have no idea what that word means. I made it up.”

Thom is a family therapist, and sometimes I think my mind is one of his favorite playthings.

“Why didn't you challenge that word? You don't really think that is a word, do you?”

My brain starts overheating as I run the possibilities past myself.

Does he want me to challenge it because it is really a word and he knows I'll lose my turn?

Is he calling my bluff?

What if he is doing reverse psychology on me, telling me he wants me to challenge it so I won't?

But what if he is doing reverse reverse psychology on me, telling me he wants me to challenge it so I'll think he really doesn't want me to so I should?

Even writing about it confuses me.

Recently we were playing, and he used the word “zenon.” He said it was a type of gas. I challenged. He seemed surprised that it wasn't in the dictionary. We have a house rule that either of us can go beyond our Scrabble dictionary to our Webster's Colossal Comprehensive Collegiate Dictionary to challenge a challenge.

“I challenge to the big dictionary.”

He came back into the room carrying the huge dictionary with his finger in a page. “If it is in here, do you agree that I don't lose my turn?”

“If it is capitalized, you lose your turn.”

“But if it isn't capitalized, and it is in here, you agree that I don't lose my turn?”

“Sure, if it is in there, not capitalized, you don't lose your turn.”

So he opened to the page, and there it was, in neat handwriting, right where it would have been alphabetically. The tainted victory didn't seem to bother him. He seems to delight more in messing with me than in winning fair and square.

You might wonder why I put up with this. There are other similarities. I've also heard that the devil is very good looking.